Never Quite Sure
by Shadokin
Summary: No one would ever know just what she was thinking.  Per-Aftershock.


"Every passing minute is another chance to turn it all around." – Cameron Crowe

* * *

><p>The world was shaking all around. There, a sudden and deep understanding that passed through Terra as lava seeped through the cracks in the cave. The Titans were yelling to each other, and Slade was gone. Taking back control of her powers it seemed she had inadvertently triggered the dormant volcano they were standing in.<p>

Large enough to destroy the city.  
>Too big to stop.<p>

Beast Boy called to her then, as she neared him, defeated. There was so little time but she knew what had to be done. Around her everything seemed to slow and she could not bear to look her former friend in the eye.

"_Terra! Come on! We gotta go!"_

He told her they had to leave, his arms at her shoulders. There was no hate or anger in his voice, and his touch only told her that he intended to bring her out with him.

She did not want to die. Yet, Terra told Beast Boy the truth – she had to stay. The rest of the team had stopped momentarily, seeing where the pair was and waited. For a moment the past was forgotten. Terra had gotten rid of Slade and fought back against him, and for a moment that was all they would think about. They could not see Beast Boy's face as Terra spoke. He was in complete shock and did not want to believe it.

"_I have to stay."_

So he tried one last attempt to convince her otherwise. She could not stay because there was nothing she could do to prevent the eruption. However, even as he said this he realized the same thing that she did. He knew how she could stop it.

"_Please, Terra, you can't! It's too late!"_

Terra finally opened her eyes, pushing a strand of blond hair away as she looked to him. There was a smile on her face, but the reasons behind it remained unclear to the boy. She was finally free of Slade, and maybe that did not change her past but that did change the present.

"_It's never too late."_

She did not want to die. Terra moved forward to find comfort in Beast Boy's embrace. It would be for the last time, and it felt just as final. Then it hit her that she was saying goodbye, and before she knew it tears formed in her eyes. She pressed her face closer, hoping to let Beast Boy know how sorry she felt, how much she wish things could have been different. There was no time to explain all she wanted to say.

"_You were the best friend I ever had."_

Her mind cleared as they stepped away from each other. The platform split, and Terra found it easy to send Beast Boy's half away towards the rest of the team. She caught their looks for a moment. They were staring at her in wonder, all of them trying to understand what she was doing. Immediately when Terra did not follow after Beast Boy, they knew she was staying behind.

Raven was the first to run out of the cave, leading the others. There was something bitter in her mouth when she realized what was happening. Terra was not coming with them. It seemed like so long ago when they had accepted her on their team.

"_Congratulations, Terra. You earned it."_

Robin was right behind her, refusing to think about what his team was doing. They had to get out of there, and Terra could not be forced to go with them. She was a criminal, but she was more than that to them. Friend, teammate, enemy. Either way, he could not dwell on what she was when he knew they were leaving her behind.

"_You've got some real talent there."_

Starfire followed after her two friends, giving Terra one last farewell glace. She felt her heart being pulled, for she knew Terra was not coming with them yet apart of her still did not grasp the concept. The alien princess had taken to the girl immediately when they met, and now she only hoped that they would be able to see Terra's bright face once again afterwards.

"_Do you wish to be my friend?"_

Cyborg took hold of Beast Boy, making sure his friend was not staying behind as well. He stepped back, and watched Beast Boy try and prolong his final gaze upon the yellow glowing girl. Cyborg could not even look at her, unsure of how he felt. She was doing the right thing, but after how long. So many things could have been avoided if only – his thoughts stopped there. None of that mattered now. He pulled Beast Boy with him as they ran out of the cave with the rest of the team.

"_If it isn't my favorite little rock-and-roller!"_

She did not want to die. This thought was cast away as Terra watched the remaining earth break apart and molten lava surrounded her. The only focus she had was stopping the volcano in time. Nothing else mattered. Her body was still, and no one but her would ever know exactly what ran through her mind as her body glowed and her power was drawn out. No one would know if she really had no regrets, if she was doing this for the Titans or herself or the city, no one would know just what it was that made her do the things she did.

"_You just don't understand."_

She was many things to the Titans. From the beginning they were drawn to her, and in the end they still tried to reach out in hopes she would see what she had been blinded to for so long. Terra stopped the volcano that day, and the world was silent for the five young heroes. When they went back, they found her still in the cave. Solid as a rock with arms outstretched arms and a crack that ran from her left eye down to the side of her face. Raven's used her powers but could not sense Terra mind, and Cyborg's scanners were not able to pick up any signatures that verified the statue was even her. They all knew it was though.

They made her a plaque – as a sort of honor. She was a Teen Titan, and though it was hard for them to say aloud she was also a true friend. In each of their hearts she had a place, though what that place was for only they could say. She had left them, but she was not gone. One day, the Titans knew, they would meet again. Even if it was only to once more part ways. Even if she did not remember or did not want to. Certainly many things would happen with the team before that day came, and they all wondered what it would hold. Until then they would remember her, and the things she had done. The good, the bad, and the not so sure. And until that fateful day when she came back they would move on with their lives, silently questioning if, when the time came, she would be able to move on with hers.

* * *

><p>"It takes less time to do things right than to explain why you did it wrong." – Henry Wadsworth Longfellow<p>

* * *

><p><em>AN: The quotes/dialogue came from either the episodes Aftershock part two, Titan Rising, and Terra. Not really sure why I wrote this... it just came out. _


End file.
